What am I supposed to say about this? I don’t know what.
I guess I could talk about how I have changed, at least how I think I have changed! I have become more confident. Hungrier to do things, I want more for myself. I do stuff. Ha! I actually do stuff now that I think of. Someone needs water—Cami will get it. I think it is also in part to being in a Spanish speaking culture where I don’t understand anything. I had to step up my game so that I can kind of understand what they are trying to say. If no one takes the pants then I have to grab them, I’ll get them tailored later if even at all. I actually don’t think that I need to. I deal. I am not high maintenance. I don’t need to super nice hotel. I can handle myself in a bad situation. I am not that timid child that came to TGS, afraid of the world. I am a strong female that can hail a taxi, can keep a conversation, that can to stuff.
Even with this growth of confidence, I still need to more on my social interactions of others. I am shy. And that has hindered my ability to create more connections with the people in Argentina. When I am in a situation when I am with new people, I never know what do say because what ever I say, it just ends up creating an awkward environment. I need to be pushed out of my comfort zone in that sense. I find, like at the shadow day with the host girls, that if I just speak and laugh and smile—then it ends up better. And I work better in situations where I absolutely need to talk with someone.
Well, this blog has become a post where I am just talking about how I have changed. In a sense, that is really the important part because in high school, you are supposed to find yourself, find your interests, find what you hate. After the timid nature that I gained from my middle school, it was a push to get me out of my box. TGS grabbed me and threw me out—exposing me to the world. Since I am trying to absorb everything around me, there is no time to acknowledge my imperfections and insecurities. Even though they are still present, they are not running my life like they did last year especially. Though I still think about an insecurity that ran my life, it is less prominent in my thought stream.
Although, recently that insecurity has reappeared… And, with the help of a few—I am going to make it small again.
Argentina has been both a negative and positive experience. I like the city, unlike most of my classmates. I feel at home in the neighborhood. Though I wish that we could have seen more of the city, looking back on it, I have enjoyed the little excursions to Palermo with some girls, the markets, empanadas, meat, beef, dulce de leche, walking everywhere, random times, Florida street, coffee, mate, Santa Fe, tango, tango, tango, and most of all—Argentina.
Tango! Wow. I like that dance, although I must say that I prefer ballet hands down. I don’t like being in control of the man, especially if he doesn’t know what he is doing. I like being in charge of what I am doing. But, tango has allowed me to become more subjective and allow someone else to take the reins. Cami, you don’t have to do everything man.
Coming to TGS, I was expecting a more global viewpoint. Noting the whole thing with TGS taking my out of my box, I have gained that. In my class alone, we cover 5 continents, North America, South America, Africa, Europe, and Asia. Please note that we have 6 people in our class. We also house 7 languages that students are fluent in. WHO CAN SAY THAT? Only the 9th grade class of 2012. How amazing is that?
When reading this, you must also consider the fact that this is the end of the semester. I am probably only remembering the great things about Argentina. I have had my times where I was so sick of this place.
I have gone through Culture Shock and the phases of that, I think now that I am in the acceptance phase of Culture Shock.